![]() Every single person in there starts talking among them and asking 'what was it that happened in Texas?' non-stop without getting an answer from anybody. Without uttering another word, the cowboy walks to the washing room and closes the door. When I come back, I will go check outside and, if my horse is not there, it will mean everything will have to be just as it was that time when I was in Texas. "Gentlemen," he says, "my horse is right outside and I need to go to perform my ablutions right now. All those present stop and stare at him silently. He proceeds to walk into the bar and, right after entering, pounds the floor with his foot 3 times. He gets off his horse and ties it to a pole right outside the establishment. Hasn't affected my brothers though."Ī cowboy is riding his horse in a small town and decides to stop at a bar to wash the dust of the road off of him. "It's just that my wife had us join that Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking. "Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explained. The Irishman looked quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawned and he laughed. When he came back to the bar for the second round, the bartender said: "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss." All the other regulars took notice and fell silent. One day, he came in and ordered two pints. The Irishman became a regular in the bar, and always drank the same way: He ordered three pints and drank them in turn. The bartender admitted that this was a fine tradition, and left it there. So I drink one for each me brothers and one for me self." When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days we drank together. One is in America, the other is in Australia, and I'm in Dublin. The Irishman replied: "Well, you see, I have two brothers. The bartender approached and told him: "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it, and it would taste better if you bought one at a time." When he finished them, he came back to the bar and ordered three more. Bartender memes how to#The octopus replied, “Play it? After I figure out how to get the pajamas off her I’m gonna screw it!”Īn Irishman walked into a bar in Dublin, ordered three pints of Guinness and sat at the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. The handler began to get nervous so he said to the octopus, “Hurry up and start playing the thing!” The octopus sat there eyeing the bagpipes up and down for quite a while. The man agreed and handed them to the octopus. The bartender said, “I’ll bet $100 that the octopus can’t play these bagpipes.” The bartender went into the back and brought out a set of bagpipes. After a minute or two, the octopus began playing a deep and soulful jazz solo. The octopus took it and stared for a bit. The man paid his handler $50 and sat down.Īnother man brought a saxophone to the octopus. There was no doubt that the octopus was an excellent guitar player. The octopus took the guitar, tuned it right up and began playing. One man pulled an old guitar off the wall that hadn’t been tuned in years and gave it to the octopus. He went up to the counter and bet everyone in the bar $50 that they couldn’t bring the octopus a musical instrument that it couldn’t play. A man walked into a bar with his pet octopus. ![]()
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